I got tagged by the Colonel
for this meme thing where I'm supposed to write a letter and advise my 13 year old self and tag 5 others. It's a nice Oprah-esque exercise in self indulgence and extreme narcissism which I'm all for. What's a blog if not that to begin with, but I'm not a looking back or an advice type of person. You can advise till your blue in the face people will always do what they want. If I fucked up plenty, which I have, too fucking bad for me. That's how you learn. Here's my letter.
Dear 13 year old Ted,
Stay cool.
Later,
Me.
wow, looks my advice fucking worked.
bo!
I'll tag,
Tequila Mockingbird
Simply curious girl
Segacious Hillbilly
Sara Sue
Hungry mother
32 comments:
That's the kind of advice I got from my parents. That worked, too.
nice glass o' wine. short and sweet. i tagged you for it, after I forgot to tag you for it.
nice. i tagged hungry mother and you for the same meme.
i was a douche and edited mine. i was gonna take it all down, but then a friend of mine was like "your blog is like MASH. it's usually funny, but every once in awhile there's a serious episode."
If i started telling myself what not to do, I'd never fucking stop. plus, I find it kind of depressing to look back and try and warn yourself about shit. who am I if not the idiot that fucks things up?
I love your letter! Short and simple... x
elise: thanks, If only I could always be as brief. behave yourself over there in crumpet land you Cheeky monkey xxxxxxx
I like yours. That's why I did mine in bullet points.
C.rag: we think alike. I should have told myself to bang more chicks though. that's my only true regret.I was waaaay too good sometimes.
i thought i would just do the highlights, because even WITH bullet points i doubt i could've saved mine from becoming the sad mash episode.
teq: i love the mash episode anaolgu very funny. yeah, mine could have been all happy too. i could have written, hey ted, go tell your dad to get to the doctor quick, cause he's gonna die of a fucking heart attack any second now.
that's awful. it's the surprise kicks in the nuts that life gives that hurts the most.
what's frightening is my post could've been waaaaay worse. i think i have scared off all of my readers today. at least i didn't totally be a tool and not post anything at all. it's times like these when it was way easier blogging when no one read it.
Not even lottery numbers? I already tagged sue when I made this meme up. she's too scared to do it.
teq: I want you to sob on your blog. I want to see the real you. the woman behind the booze and the brazen sexual appetite! I want a Dr Phil episode dammit! That's not us.
"at least I didn't totally be a tool and not post anything at all." like me?
Most of the times I try to write like no one else is reading it but that's kind of hard. but I don't want it to be an indie fest either with all inside jokes, and personal shit that no one else can get. I see that around bloggoslavania and I wonder, what the fuck is this person talking about?
malach: Lottery? shit, I'd lay a boatload of money on the red sox in 04' down 0-3 to the yanks.
as for Sara Sue, this one might be a tad too personal for people... like myself.
Don't wanna.
Curious: I hear ya. I didn't want to do it either. well, my work is done either way.
It's hard to write when you get an audience.
I just let my vaginal juices do the talking.
C.RAG: is that how you write your christmas cards too? Vaginal juice and a quill pen. what happens when you get old and there's nomore juice?
mmm i wish c.args vaginal juices would talk to me... she was teasing me again today, talking about wanting a ticket to minneapolis for xmas. RAAAAAWR!
Teq: I know i saw that, I'd send her the airfare if I was you.
eh, i'm poor white folk. besides, the longer she waits, the more riled up she will be when she finally gets here.
teq: a turn of the screw eh? lesbo tease
I tend to avoid tags like the plague. I've been tagged here and there. You're lucky I like you, or I might not even have acknowledged it. I might do it when I get back from vacation.
curious: well, I feel very honored to be "acknowleged"
As you should.
ok, then I am.
Okay - that was the most perfect response.
You ARE cool.
a girl, a boy and me: i'll call you triple A, for short: I'm a man of few words, unless I'm drunk, or any other time I'm talking, and if living in a trailer, having a big ol' handlebar moustache and mullet and trolling for teenage girls at the mall is cool, then you're right, I'm the coolest muthafucka in the world.
Party Pooper!
prepo: I'm a party of one
Beautiful! I'm not ignoring your tag, honest ... I'll do it someday :)
Well, there you go- the perfect letter.
That's why we all stick around.
That and the free beer.
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