One of my favorite things to bitch about is all the assholes that I'm supposedly friends with on Facebook. If Facebook does one thing well it is point out annoying habits of people you kind of know. Actually, It doesn't just point out people's annoying traits, it magnifies them until a person you kind of liked becomes a person you'd like to urinate on. Being a self taught psychoanalyst, I can pretty much deconstruct someone from what they post on Facebook. Obviously, the more someone posts, the easier it becomes to make inferences about someone's personality and psychological state. basically it's the same as talking to someone you just met. if you talk for three minutes they might seem nice and stable, give the same person three hours to spew their idiocy and you find out what a complete train wreck they are. Facebook is just like that with the one exception, you already supposedly know these people. This is where Facebook breaks ground. Facebook offers up in little snippets and 30 word bites someone's true personality. It reveals more about how people view themselves and how they view their place in the world than years of conversation. For example: "why is it always the people you trust the most that always disappoint you?" I can't tell you how many times I have read some version and variation of this post from some stupid married chick. Now the whole world knows that you've been let down. Boo fucking hoo. That's what I call a Martyr post. The whole world is against me now comfort me oh Facebook minions. The women who write this will never ever get the amount of attention they believe they deserve and will forever drive their poor husbands or boyfriends fucking nuts.
It is fairly easy to deduce from the facebook posts of most married women that they are miserable fucking bitches who need lots of attention and lots of psychological and medicinal help. It is also fairly easy to deduce that single women are also miserable harpies just waiting to sink their ravenous life sucking claws into a man...any man. Which brings me to deconstructing the men on facebook. There are pretty much two types, the type that kiss every girls ass on Facebook LOL-ing at every lame joke and agreeing with every lame scribble in the hopes of turning their ass kissery into some poon time and the guys who hardly write anything. I fall somewhere in between. I like trolling for facebook whores too but I can and never will lower myself to laugh at some jerky female's post that 97.5% of the time is the most unfunny douche scrawl I've ever read. I could go on forever.
1 comments:
How bout the ass hats who have 698 friends.
Fuck you douche bag. Nobody has that many friends.
And don't fucking ask me to be your friend if you don't even know me or are not really my friend, relative or in some way shared an important life experience.
If I don't really know you, you are not going to be my fucking friend.
You gotta be somebody to be a Sagacious friend, not some ass wipe collecting names.
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