YOU'D HAVE TO BE A FUCKING ASSHOLE NOT TO SEE THIS COMING

I know it's old news but katy perry splitting from her asshole ex-junkie brit wanker husband Russell Brand was to say the least, predictable and by predictable I take you back to my own post of august 4th 2010, "I laugh every time I hear the expensive gifts she's buying for her fiance, Russel Brand. The guy is an ex-junkie and sex addict. if he hasn't already, I guarantee he will get caught fucking someone else. She's got a smoking body and all but she's just one chick and sooner or later, Russell is just gonna want a different smoking body to bang. Good luck with the marriage titsy." I mean not an exactly hard call to make but I'm pretty good with predictions. Here's another prediction, I'm gonna stare at Katy Perry pictures on the internet until I get horny and then I'll find some good porn to fap to. Here's another prediction, Obama will be president in 2013.

JUST IN CASE YOU THOUGHT I FORGOT; CHELSEA HANDLER IS AS FUNNY AS AN ANAL FISSURE AND TWICE AS UGLY

Fucking shitcow turd hoppin' scuz queen. I keep seeing a commercial for her sitcom, Are You There, Chelsea? Where she's standing next to an actually pretty comedienne named Whitney Cummings from the aptly titled shitty sitcom Whitney and Laura Prepon the asshole scientologist but hot as hell red head from That 70's show fame. Laura Prepon is actually playing the role of human dogbowl, Chelsea handler on Are You There, Chelsea? The studio at first wanted a crackwhore they found swimming in a dumpster filled with urine who had just taken a shit in her nylons and smeared it all over her face to play Chelsea to make it believable but then someone suggested putting a hot chick on the show so people might actually tune in instead of just vomiting. Anyway, in this advert for Chelsea's new show, the three chicks are standing there and then the dude from the Whitney show comes out and says the girls are hot or some dumb shit and then Chelsea because she's so funny and beautiful starts to mock him for his weak facial hair. She then storms off in unfunny pretend cuntrag disgust. In typical Chandler fashion it looks like, Are you there, Chelsea? is gonna be just one more example of a terrible sitcom coming from a terrible, unfunny person being foisted on poor, sick, America. Watch either of these Shitcoms and count the rhythm of setup, punchline and canned laughter. Like a Waltz of misery 123- 123- 123 It's fucking embarrassingly stupid and lame and unfunny.
Chelsea Handler, Not funny, never will be, plus she looks like armpit smell wrapped in greasy butter paper